being romantically frustrated is 1000000 worse than being sexually frustrated because you can get yourself off but you can’t spoon with yourself and kiss your own forehead
judging by fan fictions, the only jobs in the world are being a teacher, lawyer, waiter, or working at a coffee shop
There’s nothing like deep breaths after laughing that hard. Nothing in the world like a sore stomach for the right reasons.
"how’d you learn to read so fast?"